Father

Space. A view I never tire of as I look out of the window in my room.

Sighing, I stare at my hands. Why? Why was it me chosen to look like this hideous beast? But I know why. Everytime i think of him, I burn up inside. Anger swells up within me and I scream, maybe bang my tail. Augh, I feel the anger right now. I think I will do that.

Ahhh, that feels better, though I still feel angry. And sad. And hurt. The pain will never leave me.

Ugh, SOMEones banging on the door telling me to shut up already. Bah, I'll just open the door and knock on her head telling me to leave me alone damnit.

Hah, I love doing that. I think she got the point that I want to be left alone right now.

Alone.... I've been alone since the time I was very little. He would always abandon me for days at a time. But I loved him then. I'd glomp him upon his returns. Smile, laugh, express my love. And I think he loved me back. For a while.

But then HE arrived in our home. I was told to stay away from him. But then I got mad at him. And when he left again, I decided to spite him. When HE approached me, instead of going to one of the Kaminoans, I talked with him. I told him I loved space dragons. Showed him my stuffed toy Mr. Scales. HE smiled kindly at me and told me he could show me space dragons. Real ones, even though they had been all slain well before the days of the Old Republic. I should have refused then, ran, or something.

But I didn't.

He promised I'd be back before it was noticed I was gone by him. He took me aboard his ship. I feel asleep during the trip, though now I think I was drugged in order to make it appear no time had passed. Either way, I arrived in their base after what seemed like one long nap later.

They did have space dragons. Clones. I was allowed to play with the babies. I had so much fun with the little beings.... But one day, I fell asleep. And when I had awaken..... It was not to my face.........

My eyes swell up with tears now as I look at my dim reflection in the window. A mouth full of fangs, slitted pupils, a face of red scales, wings growing out of my backm a tail from my butt....

Space dragon wings.

That bastard had messed with my DNA. Now I wasn't a little girl. I was an It. And the baby space dragons.... I don't know what kind of brain washing they underwent to hate humans, but even in my new form, they attacked me. So did the adults.

My "training". Getting thrown into a room with them and told not to die. If I wasn't such an important specimen, they would've let them tear me into shreds. The scars are evident of that. Luckily I had managed to escape with my life when I was ten. Been free ever since. Or as close to it as you can get when you have the galaxies biggest bounty on your head.

But you never looked for me. It was only after the bounty got placed on my head you cared...about the money.

You're the source of all my misery Father.

Oh sure, you cloned me from your DNA. Gave me food and shelter when I was little. But you also gave me your accursed name, FETT.

Thats right, I know all about you. I stole a data disk when I escape and, when I decoded it after several years, it mentioned YOU, your identity and bounty hunter extrodinaire, Boba Fett.

People shudder at your name. Others have nightmares. Me, I feel nothing but hate. If you're such a great warrior, why didn't you ever come fetch me, eh?

Because you never gave a damn.

And it hurts. After all these years it hurts.

You know why? Because I, your clone daughter Cecilia Fett, still love you. You tried to take me back to HIM, you never looked for me, and sometimes I get the feeling you never really cared about me. And after all that, all my hate and suffering and sadness, still love you.

Tears are running down my face now as I sob uncontrollibly. Fetts ain't supposed to cry. Another reason for you to hate me, I ain't strong. And I probably need therapy. Fetts don't need therapy. But maybe I'm not a Fett. Even though I look like you underneath all the scales.

As I look at my look alike face, now with tears running down it, I just ask one question to myself: Why Father, why? Aren't fathers supposed to love their daughters? I guess I wouldn't know. I never really had a family until now. Where I'm accepted for who I am underneath my screwed up-ness. And cared for. But I still ask this.

Why, Father, do you no longer care about me? What did I do that was so bad? Why......